This song is simply... beautiful. So well written. Our society and our world so desperately need men to stand up and BE men. The leading man. The man God calls them to be. The man whose faith in our God and Savior is the driving force in his life. Instead of self-righteousness, greed, envy, or lust. The man who loves his wife as Christ loves the church, who gives himself up for her to make her holy.... leading her. The man who boasts of nothing but the cross. Who brings up his children in the instruction of the Lord. Who is strong. Consistent. Patient. Compassionate. Honest. Hard-working. THIS is what families need. THIS is what fuels the desire for a wife to respect, honor, and submit to her husband. And this... is what I'm eternally grateful for in my husband.
(you will need to pause the current song. scroll down and to the right in the black box you can click pause on the playlist)
(and you may have to double click on this video to view the full screen on youtube)
image
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Sunday, November 14, 2010
I'm Out Of The Zone
The average woman uses 7,000 words per day. That's a lot of talking. And generally speaking, I talk a lot. It may not always be with an adult, but regardless, I'm sure I fill that daily quota. In doing my lesson last week, I'm learning that my responsibility to tell others of the gospel and encouraging others in the Lord carry a lot more weight than I give attention to. I tend to remain more on the surface. And not because I necessarily want to, but simply because that's all that is in my comfort zone. You know what else is in my comfort zone? This blog. Writing all by myself from behind my computer screen. Where I can think about things before typing and clicking on "publish post." Where I don't have to deal with any awkward silence, mushy emotions, difficult questions, and/ or confrontation. Why is that?? Why can't I simply talk to people? Why can't I be more verbal? I'm a total Peter (pre-crucifixion that is). I lack boldness. I care so much but lack the boldness to speak for it.
I have reason to rejoice. Isaiah 12:4 says "Give praise to the LORD, proclaim His name; make known among the nations what He has done, and proclaim that His name is exalted."
What good is my growth, my joy and my desire to be used if I don't step out of that comfort zone and get my feet wet?
Sooo, here's to deeper conversation... to boasting of the Lord, and not keeping all to myself the work He's done, doing, and will do.
I have reason to rejoice. Isaiah 12:4 says "Give praise to the LORD, proclaim His name; make known among the nations what He has done, and proclaim that His name is exalted."
What good is my growth, my joy and my desire to be used if I don't step out of that comfort zone and get my feet wet?
Sooo, here's to deeper conversation... to boasting of the Lord, and not keeping all to myself the work He's done, doing, and will do.
Saturday, October 30, 2010
I LOVE . . .
.... watching my oldest daughter turn into a beautiful young girl.
... seeing her smile at me.
... catching these quiet moments in our busy lives.
... and then these moments that warm my heart.
... and this man.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
FFD Wives for Christ
Don't know where it's going.... not sure how we're going to get there...
But I guess I just felt the need for us fire wives who have so much in common to be more connected. We are wives to firefighters, moms to kids, and sisters in Christ. And it has been on my heart to start something.... something to where we can all connect, grow, support and serve together. Whether that's through a bible study, helping each other out with babysitting, delivering meals to families in need, play dates, prayer requests, etc etc etc. And I don't want something that becomes a monthly meeting where we all just smile, take part in surface conversation, eat some brownies and go home. I think it can be more than that. I think it can be real. Genuine. Sincere. I think we can build friendships and fellowship that not only benefits ourselves but others too, and ultimately glorifies God.
Like I said, not sure how we're going to get there... so I'm just following His lead. And hoping others do as well.
http://ffdwivesforchrist.blogspot.com/
But I guess I just felt the need for us fire wives who have so much in common to be more connected. We are wives to firefighters, moms to kids, and sisters in Christ. And it has been on my heart to start something.... something to where we can all connect, grow, support and serve together. Whether that's through a bible study, helping each other out with babysitting, delivering meals to families in need, play dates, prayer requests, etc etc etc. And I don't want something that becomes a monthly meeting where we all just smile, take part in surface conversation, eat some brownies and go home. I think it can be more than that. I think it can be real. Genuine. Sincere. I think we can build friendships and fellowship that not only benefits ourselves but others too, and ultimately glorifies God.
Like I said, not sure how we're going to get there... so I'm just following His lead. And hoping others do as well.
http://ffdwivesforchrist.blogspot.com/
Monday, October 25, 2010
Description Of The Heart
Nothing else can describe my heart better than the song "God With Us" by Mercy Me.
This song means so much to me. And so deeply touches my soul with love for Jesus Christ, the son of God, the Lord Almighty, the Holy One.
Who are we that You would be mindful of us?
What do You see, that's worth looking our way?
We are free, in ways that we never should be.
Sweet release from the grips of these chains.
Like hinges straining from the weight
My heart no longer can keep from singing...
All that is within me cries
For You alone be glorified
Emmanuel, God with us.
My heart sings a brand new song
The debt is paid, these chains are gone
Emmanuel, God with us
Lord You know
Our hearts don't deserve Your glory
But still You show a love we cannot afford
Like hinges straining from the weight
My heart no longer can keep from singing...
All that is within me cries
For You alone be glorified
Emmanuel, God with us.
My heart sings a brand new song
The debt is paid, these chains are gone
Emmanuel, God with us
Such a tiny offering
Compared to Calvary
But nevertheless, we lay it at Your feet
Such a tiny offering
Compared to Calvary
But nevertheless, we lay this at Your feet
All that is within me cries
For You alone be glorified
Emmanuel, God with us.
My heart sings a brand new song
MY debt is paid, these chains are gone
Emmanuel, God with us
This song means so much to me. And so deeply touches my soul with love for Jesus Christ, the son of God, the Lord Almighty, the Holy One.
Who are we that You would be mindful of us?
What do You see, that's worth looking our way?
We are free, in ways that we never should be.
Sweet release from the grips of these chains.
Like hinges straining from the weight
My heart no longer can keep from singing...
All that is within me cries
For You alone be glorified
Emmanuel, God with us.
My heart sings a brand new song
The debt is paid, these chains are gone
Emmanuel, God with us
Lord You know
Our hearts don't deserve Your glory
But still You show a love we cannot afford
Like hinges straining from the weight
My heart no longer can keep from singing...
All that is within me cries
For You alone be glorified
Emmanuel, God with us.
My heart sings a brand new song
The debt is paid, these chains are gone
Emmanuel, God with us
Such a tiny offering
Compared to Calvary
But nevertheless, we lay it at Your feet
Such a tiny offering
Compared to Calvary
But nevertheless, we lay this at Your feet
All that is within me cries
For You alone be glorified
Emmanuel, God with us.
My heart sings a brand new song
MY debt is paid, these chains are gone
Emmanuel, God with us
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Six Years... Six of the BEST.
Yesterday was September 18. And all throughout the day I would look at the clock and think back to what exactly I was doing at that time 6 years ago.
I remember first looking at the clock at just after 6:00 AM. And remembered sitting on a stool in my mom's bathroom, as my sister-in-law (brother's girlfriend at the time) did my make-up. And I believe my dad was pacing because we had to leave to head to the wedding site in Fallbrook.
Then I remember seeing the clock at about 10:15. I realized I would have been in the bridal room at that time... all my girls there, probably having my hair done, overwhelmed with excitement. And I remembered reaching around the door to the bridal room, hiding behind it so not to be seen, and then grasping Frankie's hand. I was SO elated. SO excited. I had no idea at the time that he was crying. Not until I saw the pictures afterwards...
And then saying our vows. Don't remember much about those moments. haha All I remember is staring at Frankie, and his happy eyes. I couldn't believe it was happening. And then it was over and we were kissing. :)
And then, party time! Barely ate my meal, didn't have any cake (other than what was wiped on my face), and never even made it to the 5-tier chocolate fountain. But we had a GREAT time.
Thank you Frankie, for the last six years of marriage. And the last ten years together. You are my best friend, my everything. Thank you for our daughters. Thank you for working hard so that I can stay at home with them. Thank you for loving me the way you do, for your understanding, your compassion, and for taking care of me. Thank you for making me laugh. You make me so happy, and I really see how blessed I am. Blessed to have a husband that loves the Lord first, and loves his wife as Christ loved the church. A husband who knows what it means to lead his family, and is an example for his daughters. I sincerely never loved you more than I do now. THANK YOU for all you do, and have done to make this the best six years of my life. Looking forward to the next 60 years. Happy Anniversary.
I remember first looking at the clock at just after 6:00 AM. And remembered sitting on a stool in my mom's bathroom, as my sister-in-law (brother's girlfriend at the time) did my make-up. And I believe my dad was pacing because we had to leave to head to the wedding site in Fallbrook.
Then I remember seeing the clock at about 10:15. I realized I would have been in the bridal room at that time... all my girls there, probably having my hair done, overwhelmed with excitement. And I remembered reaching around the door to the bridal room, hiding behind it so not to be seen, and then grasping Frankie's hand. I was SO elated. SO excited. I had no idea at the time that he was crying. Not until I saw the pictures afterwards...
And then saying our vows. Don't remember much about those moments. haha All I remember is staring at Frankie, and his happy eyes. I couldn't believe it was happening. And then it was over and we were kissing. :)
And then, party time! Barely ate my meal, didn't have any cake (other than what was wiped on my face), and never even made it to the 5-tier chocolate fountain. But we had a GREAT time.
Thank you Frankie, for the last six years of marriage. And the last ten years together. You are my best friend, my everything. Thank you for our daughters. Thank you for working hard so that I can stay at home with them. Thank you for loving me the way you do, for your understanding, your compassion, and for taking care of me. Thank you for making me laugh. You make me so happy, and I really see how blessed I am. Blessed to have a husband that loves the Lord first, and loves his wife as Christ loved the church. A husband who knows what it means to lead his family, and is an example for his daughters. I sincerely never loved you more than I do now. THANK YOU for all you do, and have done to make this the best six years of my life. Looking forward to the next 60 years. Happy Anniversary.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
A Consideration... And Prayer Request
Oh how this is a hot button issue. I had no idea.
So Frankie and I are beginning to consider homeschooling. For the first few years. I don't know, til 2nd grade, til 4th grade, I don't know. It is simply a thought right now. A consideration. Yet also a prayer request. I don't need 241 comments on this blog about everyone's individual opinions on whether or not I should homeschool. I would not base a decision like that upon everyone else's opinions. However, I would like to ask for prayer on it.
I am homeschooling Victoria for preschool this year. Next year she would be entering kindergarten. Frankie and I have been doing a lot of talking lately. Mostly just between the two of us, and now I am branching out talking to moms who have had some experience with it and can give me some deeper insight into it. Our basic thoughts are this: as her parents, we want to control the influences surrounding her. Giving her daily interaction with positive role models and minimal interaction with negative role models. And implementing biblical principles and scripture into her education is extremely important to us. I am not the least concerned about socialization. We go to Sunday school, BSF, gymnastics, playdates, etc etc. Some may say that's sheltering, but you know what? I like to challenge that thought.... so what's wrong with that?? As her parent I feel that's my responsibility. She doesn't NEED to be exposed to everything out there. She will be eventually. So why not establish the strongest foundation possible while she is young and while I still have the ability to control her learning environment? If the theory is to get them out there and just give them the opportunity to make the right choices then why not send them to a party at 16 years old when you know there will be drinking... just to give them the opportunity to make the right choice. No, I feel there is a certain amount of limits you can place on your child to help keep them from stumbling. Once they reach a certain age you can't do that anymore... you HAVE to let go. But right now I don't. So I want to take advantage of it. Not too many years from now, my opinion, Frankie's opinion... they won't hold much weight. Her friends, her peers, the "cool crowd"... those opinions will matter. But if she has had that daily interaction with her father and I for those first few years, and is more grounded... I'm thinking she will be able to make better choices. And not hold so much value to that "cool crowd" opinion.
Does that mean I have decided for certain on homeschooling? No. I am not sure I am fully equipped to do so. But I have a husband that is home during the day, and also desires to go down this path. And having his help is huge.
And another thing to consider: we travel a lot. We left just about everything behind when we picked up and moved to Fresno in February of 2005, only 5 months after getting married and settling into our little condo in Anaheim Hills. I was terrified. I knew no one. I had no family here. No church. I certainly couldn't fathom starting a family here "all alone." Granted, God has worked through all that and we love it here. We have established an incredible life here and I am thankful EVERY day for it. And for Frankie's job. It allows us to go where ever we want... on a Tuesday afternoon. Go to southern california in middle of the week. And stay a week if we want. Go camping for 2 weeks if we want. Not only when the schools have days off. Once we put V in school those trips are going to be extremely limited. Seeing our family will be very limited. Neither of us want that. Again, eventually she will be in school. Can't completely avoid that and don't want to. But for now, it would be a great advantage to be going at our own pace, making our own schedule.
So, what's the point of this post again?? Oh ya, to ask for prayer on this. I am going to do my research, really check into this and really pray about it. I believe with all my heart God will reveal what would be best for our family. Any prayers to get us to that point would be helpful. :)
So Frankie and I are beginning to consider homeschooling. For the first few years. I don't know, til 2nd grade, til 4th grade, I don't know. It is simply a thought right now. A consideration. Yet also a prayer request. I don't need 241 comments on this blog about everyone's individual opinions on whether or not I should homeschool. I would not base a decision like that upon everyone else's opinions. However, I would like to ask for prayer on it.
I am homeschooling Victoria for preschool this year. Next year she would be entering kindergarten. Frankie and I have been doing a lot of talking lately. Mostly just between the two of us, and now I am branching out talking to moms who have had some experience with it and can give me some deeper insight into it. Our basic thoughts are this: as her parents, we want to control the influences surrounding her. Giving her daily interaction with positive role models and minimal interaction with negative role models. And implementing biblical principles and scripture into her education is extremely important to us. I am not the least concerned about socialization. We go to Sunday school, BSF, gymnastics, playdates, etc etc. Some may say that's sheltering, but you know what? I like to challenge that thought.... so what's wrong with that?? As her parent I feel that's my responsibility. She doesn't NEED to be exposed to everything out there. She will be eventually. So why not establish the strongest foundation possible while she is young and while I still have the ability to control her learning environment? If the theory is to get them out there and just give them the opportunity to make the right choices then why not send them to a party at 16 years old when you know there will be drinking... just to give them the opportunity to make the right choice. No, I feel there is a certain amount of limits you can place on your child to help keep them from stumbling. Once they reach a certain age you can't do that anymore... you HAVE to let go. But right now I don't. So I want to take advantage of it. Not too many years from now, my opinion, Frankie's opinion... they won't hold much weight. Her friends, her peers, the "cool crowd"... those opinions will matter. But if she has had that daily interaction with her father and I for those first few years, and is more grounded... I'm thinking she will be able to make better choices. And not hold so much value to that "cool crowd" opinion.
Does that mean I have decided for certain on homeschooling? No. I am not sure I am fully equipped to do so. But I have a husband that is home during the day, and also desires to go down this path. And having his help is huge.
And another thing to consider: we travel a lot. We left just about everything behind when we picked up and moved to Fresno in February of 2005, only 5 months after getting married and settling into our little condo in Anaheim Hills. I was terrified. I knew no one. I had no family here. No church. I certainly couldn't fathom starting a family here "all alone." Granted, God has worked through all that and we love it here. We have established an incredible life here and I am thankful EVERY day for it. And for Frankie's job. It allows us to go where ever we want... on a Tuesday afternoon. Go to southern california in middle of the week. And stay a week if we want. Go camping for 2 weeks if we want. Not only when the schools have days off. Once we put V in school those trips are going to be extremely limited. Seeing our family will be very limited. Neither of us want that. Again, eventually she will be in school. Can't completely avoid that and don't want to. But for now, it would be a great advantage to be going at our own pace, making our own schedule.
So, what's the point of this post again?? Oh ya, to ask for prayer on this. I am going to do my research, really check into this and really pray about it. I believe with all my heart God will reveal what would be best for our family. Any prayers to get us to that point would be helpful. :)
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
It's baaaaack!
BSF. It's finally here again. Starts September 15th.
Victoria has shed several tears this summer over missing it. Sometimes we would listen to her BSF songs they sang while studying the book of John this last year.... and after about the 2nd or 3rd song she would cover her face and just start crying. Such a genuine cry too. Not whiny. Just tears. And she would try to compose herself long enough to tell me she is sad because she hasn't been to BSF in SO long. She even referred to her two teachers as her grandmas. They'll love to hear that.
And I have definitely not been in the word as much as I would have liked to have been over the summer. I still need the accountability. And it's here! Yaaay! We will be studying the book of Isaiah. Which is totally new. They have never done this study before so it should be interesting.... especially considering Isaiah is all about warning and judgement. Yikes. This could be a very convicting year.... bring it on!
http://www.bsfinternational.org/
Victoria has shed several tears this summer over missing it. Sometimes we would listen to her BSF songs they sang while studying the book of John this last year.... and after about the 2nd or 3rd song she would cover her face and just start crying. Such a genuine cry too. Not whiny. Just tears. And she would try to compose herself long enough to tell me she is sad because she hasn't been to BSF in SO long. She even referred to her two teachers as her grandmas. They'll love to hear that.
And I have definitely not been in the word as much as I would have liked to have been over the summer. I still need the accountability. And it's here! Yaaay! We will be studying the book of Isaiah. Which is totally new. They have never done this study before so it should be interesting.... especially considering Isaiah is all about warning and judgement. Yikes. This could be a very convicting year.... bring it on!
http://www.bsfinternational.org/
Monday, September 6, 2010
Calling All Babysitters
What do I need to do... put an ad out in the paper?? Babysitter troubles are so stressful!
So we first had this wonderful sitter pretty regularly. Charlotte. Loved her. A heart for children, and for blessing others by caring for their children. Yet life changes happen, and she took on a new opportunity within the church that would no longer allow her the availability to babysit for us. Great for her, but of course I was super bummed for our loss. Ok so moving on.... we then interviewed one of her closest friends, Rebekah. SUCH a doll. Bubbly, active, and fun. V loved her right away so she was our sitter for the last 3 months. Then again, life changes. It was time to start a new school year, which for Rebekah, is in southern california. Nooooooo!!!
So here we are, back at square one. We just had a new sitter watch the girls last Sunday evening, and it went well. Sophie didn't even cry when she walked in which is HUGE. But the poor thing can't live off babysitting, she is also a waitress and her schedule is constantly changing. So we are in desperate need of another one. MUCH easier said than done.
Do I just wear a sign on my back everywhere I go:
Looking For Babysitter who....
-is completely honest
-is not afraid to deal with a meltdown here or there
-isn't afraid to have fun and be silly
-loves the Lord
-will love and understand my children
-will comfort them as needed
.... okay is this too much to ask?? Maybe it is... but I don't think so. Please, mystery babysitter, if you're out there, contact me!!! We need you.
So we first had this wonderful sitter pretty regularly. Charlotte. Loved her. A heart for children, and for blessing others by caring for their children. Yet life changes happen, and she took on a new opportunity within the church that would no longer allow her the availability to babysit for us. Great for her, but of course I was super bummed for our loss. Ok so moving on.... we then interviewed one of her closest friends, Rebekah. SUCH a doll. Bubbly, active, and fun. V loved her right away so she was our sitter for the last 3 months. Then again, life changes. It was time to start a new school year, which for Rebekah, is in southern california. Nooooooo!!!
So here we are, back at square one. We just had a new sitter watch the girls last Sunday evening, and it went well. Sophie didn't even cry when she walked in which is HUGE. But the poor thing can't live off babysitting, she is also a waitress and her schedule is constantly changing. So we are in desperate need of another one. MUCH easier said than done.
Do I just wear a sign on my back everywhere I go:
Looking For Babysitter who....
-is completely honest
-is not afraid to deal with a meltdown here or there
-isn't afraid to have fun and be silly
-loves the Lord
-will love and understand my children
-will comfort them as needed
.... okay is this too much to ask?? Maybe it is... but I don't think so. Please, mystery babysitter, if you're out there, contact me!!! We need you.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Saving Grace
So for several months now Victoria and I have been getting into conversations about Jesus. She knows what the Trinity is. She knows Jesus died on the cross. She knows He is God's Son. And as soon as I attempt to dive a little deeper with her, it would go something like this...
Me: "So V, do you know what? You can have Jesus live forever in your heart, if you just ask Him. Do you understand? You just have to ask Him to come into your heart and He will forever be with you and guide you and take care of you."
(A long silent pause...)
V: "Look Mommy! A balloon!!"
Oh, the lengthy attention span of a 3 1/2 year old.
So last week, I was getting V ready for the day. She was standing on her stool brushing her teeth and I was doing her hair. And she happened to mention that Jesus is up in heaven. I replied yes He is, and reminded her that not only is He in heaven, He is with her, and He can come and live in her heart when she asks him to. Again, the silence. Then, "Mommy, I want to ask Him." I about dropped the hairbrush and ran to get Daddy. We went into her room and sat down on the floor. Daddy prayed and she repeated after him- thanking God for sending His Son to die for us. Asking Him into her heart. We said "Amen" and she precedes to throw a ball at Daddy while he and I exchange smiles.
A few hours later, I was putting V down for her nap. We hadn't mentioned her prayer earlier in the day, but we always pray before she goes to sleep so she lays down and she begins to pray... "Dear God, thank you for Mommy, Daddy, sissy and V. And please God help Jesus come and live in my heart. In Jesus' name, Amen." Tears stung my eyes as I kiss her and tell her how special that prayer was. I walked out of her room and shut the door, praying thank you Lord. That was June 30, 2010. A memorable day marked in our lives.
Thinking about it later, as some may consider it "unofficial," I was thankful and believing in God's saving grace. He knows what little she understands. Yet she thought of Him on her own, and wanted to have whatever she could comprehend of Him. Which is that He loves her more than anything, He died to save her, she can talk to Him, and He lives in her heart. What AMAZING grace. And even more so, someone like me, who knows so much more of sin, selfishness, shame and lacking that child-like faith... yet by grace I am saved.
Thank you Lord.
Me: "So V, do you know what? You can have Jesus live forever in your heart, if you just ask Him. Do you understand? You just have to ask Him to come into your heart and He will forever be with you and guide you and take care of you."
(A long silent pause...)
V: "Look Mommy! A balloon!!"
Oh, the lengthy attention span of a 3 1/2 year old.
So last week, I was getting V ready for the day. She was standing on her stool brushing her teeth and I was doing her hair. And she happened to mention that Jesus is up in heaven. I replied yes He is, and reminded her that not only is He in heaven, He is with her, and He can come and live in her heart when she asks him to. Again, the silence. Then, "Mommy, I want to ask Him." I about dropped the hairbrush and ran to get Daddy. We went into her room and sat down on the floor. Daddy prayed and she repeated after him- thanking God for sending His Son to die for us. Asking Him into her heart. We said "Amen" and she precedes to throw a ball at Daddy while he and I exchange smiles.
A few hours later, I was putting V down for her nap. We hadn't mentioned her prayer earlier in the day, but we always pray before she goes to sleep so she lays down and she begins to pray... "Dear God, thank you for Mommy, Daddy, sissy and V. And please God help Jesus come and live in my heart. In Jesus' name, Amen." Tears stung my eyes as I kiss her and tell her how special that prayer was. I walked out of her room and shut the door, praying thank you Lord. That was June 30, 2010. A memorable day marked in our lives.
Thinking about it later, as some may consider it "unofficial," I was thankful and believing in God's saving grace. He knows what little she understands. Yet she thought of Him on her own, and wanted to have whatever she could comprehend of Him. Which is that He loves her more than anything, He died to save her, she can talk to Him, and He lives in her heart. What AMAZING grace. And even more so, someone like me, who knows so much more of sin, selfishness, shame and lacking that child-like faith... yet by grace I am saved.
Thank you Lord.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
I Am Running
I started running in the mornings. I'm getting up at 6 AM five days a week and running. If I would have known how much I would love it, I would have started a long time ago. Yes, the alone time is relaxing. The exercise is refreshing and energizing. The weather is perfect. The morning sun, the blooming flowers, it's all so peaceful. Yet that isn't just what I started loving so much about it. My first day of running I turn the corner out of our track and I start music on my iPod. And no joke, this is the first song that comes on.... (press play)
Yes, cheeseball, I know. But that's what happened. And it just set the mood for my whole run. Into marvelous light I AM running. Out of darkness, out of shame. By the cross You ARE the truth, You ARE the life, You ARE the way. I spent my whole jog worshipping Him. And thanking Him for the place He has brought me to in my life... to where I am desiring to glorify Him, to be the wife and mother He has called me to be. For blessing me with a husband who is the spiritual leader in our family. A husband that holds his wife's and daughter's hands and prays. Who encourages, serves, loves and appreciates me. Who makes it a joy to serve him. And for 2 beautiful and healthy daughters. And all of this only makes me want to know Him more. And read His word more. Which results in more glorification of Christ and more blessings. It's a beautiful cycle to be caught up in.
"I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life." John 8:12
So I love how simple it is- running. Into marvelous light.
Yes, cheeseball, I know. But that's what happened. And it just set the mood for my whole run. Into marvelous light I AM running. Out of darkness, out of shame. By the cross You ARE the truth, You ARE the life, You ARE the way. I spent my whole jog worshipping Him. And thanking Him for the place He has brought me to in my life... to where I am desiring to glorify Him, to be the wife and mother He has called me to be. For blessing me with a husband who is the spiritual leader in our family. A husband that holds his wife's and daughter's hands and prays. Who encourages, serves, loves and appreciates me. Who makes it a joy to serve him. And for 2 beautiful and healthy daughters. And all of this only makes me want to know Him more. And read His word more. Which results in more glorification of Christ and more blessings. It's a beautiful cycle to be caught up in.
"I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life." John 8:12
So I love how simple it is- running. Into marvelous light.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Words of Wisdom (by Victoria)
February 8, 2010
"I want to go to outer space."
February 18, 2010
All of us are at a restaurant for lunch. V pulls a fork out of the napkin wrap and starts brushing her hair then excalims "I brush my hair like Ariel!"
March 5, 2010
After I kiss her goodnight... "Mommy, you have a cute tongue!"
April 13, 2010
We are planting flowers in our front yard. V puts on her princess gardening gloves to help. After a few minutes of helping us pack dirt around the freshly planted flowers, I find her in the house washing her princess gardening gloves in the bathroom sink "cause they got dirty."
May 10, 2010
V is jumping on the couch cushions, falls and does a backwards somersault. Hops back up and shrugs her shoulders saying, "It's all part of the plan, more or less."
May 28, 2010
After Sophie keeps pushing buttons on the tv and messing up the movie that was on... "I got an idea Mommy. We should put sissy in her highchair. She won't push the buttons anymore."
June 2, 2010
"You're so weird Mommy."
"I want to go to outer space."
February 18, 2010
All of us are at a restaurant for lunch. V pulls a fork out of the napkin wrap and starts brushing her hair then excalims "I brush my hair like Ariel!"
March 5, 2010
After I kiss her goodnight... "Mommy, you have a cute tongue!"
April 13, 2010
We are planting flowers in our front yard. V puts on her princess gardening gloves to help. After a few minutes of helping us pack dirt around the freshly planted flowers, I find her in the house washing her princess gardening gloves in the bathroom sink "cause they got dirty."
May 10, 2010
V is jumping on the couch cushions, falls and does a backwards somersault. Hops back up and shrugs her shoulders saying, "It's all part of the plan, more or less."
May 28, 2010
After Sophie keeps pushing buttons on the tv and messing up the movie that was on... "I got an idea Mommy. We should put sissy in her highchair. She won't push the buttons anymore."
June 2, 2010
"You're so weird Mommy."
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
A "Wicked" Good Time
As Frankie's Christmas gift for me, he forfeited his gift and spent it all on two airline tickets for Boston. We were going to visit the Marinellis. In November 2006 my Aunt Kendall, Uncle Bob, and their (at the time) 3 children moved from Corona, CA to Massachusetts. Them and their now 4 children are greatly missed by us here in California. V is the same age as their youngest, Vincent. And they had never even met Sophie. Frankie could not have given a better Christmas gift to me... and our family. So on April 21st we took off from LAX at 7:15 AM. The girls did wonderful for the flight.
Sophie snoozed twice in my arms. They snacked, watched Mickey Mouse and Finding Nemo on a portable dvd player. --------->
It was actually not as bad as I dreaded. Just over 5 hours later we were landing in Boston, MA.
Of course, there was a home-cooked meal and 4 excited children there to greet us. The whole next day was spent hanging out outside, in beautiful weather. V jumped her little heart out on the huge trampoline, while Sophie was content being chauffeured by Gemma in the barbie jeep.
The next day we all ventured out to the Yankee Candle Factory - holy cow - the coolest place on earth!! If you've never been I can't explain it, it's just awesome. The kids had a blast, especially at the fudge shop where they made every kind of fudge you could possibly fathom.
The next day was a bbq, and lots of relaxing outside - again, beautiful weather! The kids made a huge mud pit with a trinkling hose and had a blast.
Then came Sunday... Frankie and I were leaving the girls in Hubbardston with my mom and aunt and the kids, so we could go into the city of Boston and stay for 2 days. Other than leaving Sophie for the first time ever, I was ecstatic. I bent down to hug and kiss Sophie goodbye, and as odd as it sounds, it was like she knew. She just stared into my eyes so seriously, yet sweetly, and then snuggled with me for a minute (as I began to bawl of course). I kissed and hugged V bye, who I don't think could have cared less where I was going, as long as she was still hanging out with her cousins.
Our time in Boston was indescribable. We both completely fell in love with the city. From a game at Fenway park, to the INCREDIBLE Italian food, to the subways, walks through Boston Common, to the amazing history there... from beginning to end AWESOMENESS.
After getting back from the city, it was wonderful seeing everyone again. We spent our last night at Pizza Palace. That was fun. Even though Pizza Palace is the only pizza place in Hubbardston, it IS Hubbardston. :) I think we saw one other family there. And since there were so many of us we went into the back party room and the kids had so much fun. Especially when spending probably a total of $10 in quarters on the claw machine to finally grab an elephant which V brought home and named Tiny.
Goodbyes were heart-wrenching. But we cherished our time there and made unforgettable memories. And we so much look forward to the next time.
The flight home.... well, don't really want to talk about that. 6 hours + kids on Boston time + evening flight + very cranky baby who could not go to sleep = bringing mommy and baby to tears in the cramped airplane bathroom. NOT good times. We made it through crazy LAX at 9:00 at night with 2 exhausted kids- one a cranky baby and the other a constipated 3 yr old. Aye aye aye. But we survived and as always it was good to be home. Bed at 11:00 that night NEVER felt so good.
Thank you Frankie for the incredible gift. Thank you Marinellis for opening your home to add more craziness, yet more fun. ;)
V thanks God for you every night in her prayers. We miss you all and love you very much, can't wait to see you again.
Sophie snoozed twice in my arms. They snacked, watched Mickey Mouse and Finding Nemo on a portable dvd player. --------->It was actually not as bad as I dreaded. Just over 5 hours later we were landing in Boston, MA.
Of course, there was a home-cooked meal and 4 excited children there to greet us. The whole next day was spent hanging out outside, in beautiful weather. V jumped her little heart out on the huge trampoline, while Sophie was content being chauffeured by Gemma in the barbie jeep.
The next day we all ventured out to the Yankee Candle Factory - holy cow - the coolest place on earth!! If you've never been I can't explain it, it's just awesome. The kids had a blast, especially at the fudge shop where they made every kind of fudge you could possibly fathom.
The next day was a bbq, and lots of relaxing outside - again, beautiful weather! The kids made a huge mud pit with a trinkling hose and had a blast.
Then came Sunday... Frankie and I were leaving the girls in Hubbardston with my mom and aunt and the kids, so we could go into the city of Boston and stay for 2 days. Other than leaving Sophie for the first time ever, I was ecstatic. I bent down to hug and kiss Sophie goodbye, and as odd as it sounds, it was like she knew. She just stared into my eyes so seriously, yet sweetly, and then snuggled with me for a minute (as I began to bawl of course). I kissed and hugged V bye, who I don't think could have cared less where I was going, as long as she was still hanging out with her cousins.
Our time in Boston was indescribable. We both completely fell in love with the city. From a game at Fenway park, to the INCREDIBLE Italian food, to the subways, walks through Boston Common, to the amazing history there... from beginning to end AWESOMENESS.
After getting back from the city, it was wonderful seeing everyone again. We spent our last night at Pizza Palace. That was fun. Even though Pizza Palace is the only pizza place in Hubbardston, it IS Hubbardston. :) I think we saw one other family there. And since there were so many of us we went into the back party room and the kids had so much fun. Especially when spending probably a total of $10 in quarters on the claw machine to finally grab an elephant which V brought home and named Tiny.
Goodbyes were heart-wrenching. But we cherished our time there and made unforgettable memories. And we so much look forward to the next time.
The flight home.... well, don't really want to talk about that. 6 hours + kids on Boston time + evening flight + very cranky baby who could not go to sleep = bringing mommy and baby to tears in the cramped airplane bathroom. NOT good times. We made it through crazy LAX at 9:00 at night with 2 exhausted kids- one a cranky baby and the other a constipated 3 yr old. Aye aye aye. But we survived and as always it was good to be home. Bed at 11:00 that night NEVER felt so good.
Thank you Frankie for the incredible gift. Thank you Marinellis for opening your home to add more craziness, yet more fun. ;)
V thanks God for you every night in her prayers. We miss you all and love you very much, can't wait to see you again.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Easter 2010
I celebrated Easter this year for what it truly is... the resurrection of Jesus Christ. My mom came to visit, and we took the girls to church and enjoyed a wonderful service, then had an egg hunt in the front yard. Frankie was working so we then had dinner at the fire station.
The girls had fun finding each egg... well, V found 14 and Sophie found 2, along with some dog poop at which she had scooped into her bucket. :) Gotta love this one. Into everything she can physically get her hands on.
Later that night, after the girls were in bed, I watched the Passion of the Christ. And could not stop crying. So overwhelmed by what He went through. And how many people continue to reject Him. He deserves every bit of praise, honor and glory that we can possibly give, and then some.
If you can, take a couple minutes out of your day to watch this...
(you probably need to press pause on the music to the right in order to hear this.)
The girls had fun finding each egg... well, V found 14 and Sophie found 2, along with some dog poop at which she had scooped into her bucket. :) Gotta love this one. Into everything she can physically get her hands on.
Later that night, after the girls were in bed, I watched the Passion of the Christ. And could not stop crying. So overwhelmed by what He went through. And how many people continue to reject Him. He deserves every bit of praise, honor and glory that we can possibly give, and then some.
If you can, take a couple minutes out of your day to watch this...
(you probably need to press pause on the music to the right in order to hear this.)
Friday, April 9, 2010
Die Daily
Luke 9:23-24 says, "And he said to all, 'If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.'" (ESV)
Luke 17:33 "Whoever seeks to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life will keep it." (ESV)
John 12:25 "Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life."
And 1 Corinthians 15:31 says, "I protest, brothers, by my pride in you, which I have in Christ Jesus our Lord, I die every day!" (ESV)
I could go on for much longer. The concept of dying to self has hit my heart. Denying myself, my selfish desires, dying to what the flesh wants, and living for Christ instead. It's a daily battle, a daily fight. To die daily.
I am in John 18-19 right now, studying Jesus' arrest and trials. So on Easter Sunday I watched The Passion of the Christ. I love getting a visual to what I have been reading and studying. Getting a clearer picture of exactly what Christ endured for us. If you have never seen the movie, you simply have to. Believer or not. Whether you believe Jesus was the Son of God or not, and was all He claimed to be- He was a real man, and He WAS tortured and crucified. But the beauty of it all, to those who know Him, is it was all voluntary. He was not a victim of circumstances. He knew all that was to happen to Him (John 18:4). And yet He still CHOSE to serve the Father and fulfill His purpose. When the soldiers came to the Mount of Olives to arrest Him, and over-zealous Peter draws his sword on a soldier cutting off his ear, Jesus stops him, saying "Put your sword back into its sheath. Shall I not drink from the cup the Father has given me?" (John 18:11) Even though He was in agonizing prayer (Matthew 26:36-42) over what was to happen to Him, how He was to be humiliated, mocked, beaten, tortured, and crucified, He never once wavers. "Unflinching obedience." Yes, I know He was fully God, but He was also fully human. And endured temptation.
"He went on a little farther and fell face down on the ground, praying, 'My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will, not mine.'" (Matthew 26:39) Your will, not mine. THAT is my desire. THAT is what I pray for. That is what I had to ASK to desire, because it's not natural, and doesn't come easy. However, the more time I spend with Him, for Him, the more I read in His word, the more I worship, the deeper I fall in love with Him. "Fall in love with Him." I used to hear that a lot and think, fall in love with Him? I know that I love Him, so much. I know exactly what He did on that cross, but how do you fall IN LOVE with Him? I get it now. And that is why I am denying myself, taking up my cross daily, and following Him. That is why I am losing my life, in order to keep it. That is why I am choosing to die daily.
Luke 17:33 "Whoever seeks to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life will keep it." (ESV)
John 12:25 "Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life."
And 1 Corinthians 15:31 says, "I protest, brothers, by my pride in you, which I have in Christ Jesus our Lord, I die every day!" (ESV)
I could go on for much longer. The concept of dying to self has hit my heart. Denying myself, my selfish desires, dying to what the flesh wants, and living for Christ instead. It's a daily battle, a daily fight. To die daily.
I am in John 18-19 right now, studying Jesus' arrest and trials. So on Easter Sunday I watched The Passion of the Christ. I love getting a visual to what I have been reading and studying. Getting a clearer picture of exactly what Christ endured for us. If you have never seen the movie, you simply have to. Believer or not. Whether you believe Jesus was the Son of God or not, and was all He claimed to be- He was a real man, and He WAS tortured and crucified. But the beauty of it all, to those who know Him, is it was all voluntary. He was not a victim of circumstances. He knew all that was to happen to Him (John 18:4). And yet He still CHOSE to serve the Father and fulfill His purpose. When the soldiers came to the Mount of Olives to arrest Him, and over-zealous Peter draws his sword on a soldier cutting off his ear, Jesus stops him, saying "Put your sword back into its sheath. Shall I not drink from the cup the Father has given me?" (John 18:11) Even though He was in agonizing prayer (Matthew 26:36-42) over what was to happen to Him, how He was to be humiliated, mocked, beaten, tortured, and crucified, He never once wavers. "Unflinching obedience." Yes, I know He was fully God, but He was also fully human. And endured temptation.
"He went on a little farther and fell face down on the ground, praying, 'My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will, not mine.'" (Matthew 26:39) Your will, not mine. THAT is my desire. THAT is what I pray for. That is what I had to ASK to desire, because it's not natural, and doesn't come easy. However, the more time I spend with Him, for Him, the more I read in His word, the more I worship, the deeper I fall in love with Him. "Fall in love with Him." I used to hear that a lot and think, fall in love with Him? I know that I love Him, so much. I know exactly what He did on that cross, but how do you fall IN LOVE with Him? I get it now. And that is why I am denying myself, taking up my cross daily, and following Him. That is why I am losing my life, in order to keep it. That is why I am choosing to die daily.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
S.T.I.L.
Some Things I'm Learning...
About prayer....
- Prayer is not to be our laundry list for God. It is to be simple communication with Him. Meaning- talking to Him AND listening. It should include our adoration for Him, our thankfulness, our confession and lastly, supplication. And why do we adore and thank Him in our prayers? Because He is worthy. Why confess? We know we did wrong, we know we're forgiven. But we're also just like children. If I come to Him and confess and ask for forgiveness for my sin, and I do that each time, then I might begin to think twice before doing that same thing again.
- He ALWAYS answers our prayers... it's either yes, no, or wait. Just because I don't like the answer doesn't mean He hasn't responded.
- Our entire lives should be lived in absolute dependence on God through prayer. If JESUS prayed (John 17) then I certainly need to.
- Prayer prepares us for what's to come. We have no idea what's in store for us. We have to remain in Him (John 15). And that is done through prayer, reading His word... and OBEYING it.
About prayer....
- Prayer is not to be our laundry list for God. It is to be simple communication with Him. Meaning- talking to Him AND listening. It should include our adoration for Him, our thankfulness, our confession and lastly, supplication. And why do we adore and thank Him in our prayers? Because He is worthy. Why confess? We know we did wrong, we know we're forgiven. But we're also just like children. If I come to Him and confess and ask for forgiveness for my sin, and I do that each time, then I might begin to think twice before doing that same thing again.
- He ALWAYS answers our prayers... it's either yes, no, or wait. Just because I don't like the answer doesn't mean He hasn't responded.
- Our entire lives should be lived in absolute dependence on God through prayer. If JESUS prayed (John 17) then I certainly need to.
- Prayer prepares us for what's to come. We have no idea what's in store for us. We have to remain in Him (John 15). And that is done through prayer, reading His word... and OBEYING it.
Monday, March 8, 2010
An Unexpected Reaction
A late post, but nevertheless, I'm still blogging about this. On Thursday, March 4th, I put Sophie down for her nap without nursing her. She is almost 14 months old... time to wean. I got everything ready... turned on her little toasty heater, she has a fresh diaper, and a full belly. I held her tight and just swayed back and forth, singing "It Is Well With My Soul." Within a couple minutes she relaxed, snuggled her head in my neck, and fell asleep. Once I felt her body relax and I could hear her almost snoring, I just started to cry. Like, fully cry, hoping I wouldn't wake her. I couldn't believe she didn't put up more of a fight. Granted, I have been praying about this for months. I have been stressing about it off and on, worrying that this was going to be a gut-wrenching traumatic time for the both of us. And now, here she was, falling sleep on me as I sang to her. I laid her in her crib, walked out, and quietly closed the door. Then totally CRIED. I guess some of those tears were tears of relief that it wasn't that hard on her. But mostly they were selfish tears. For over a year I have not left this baby girl for longer than a few hours. I spent every single night with her, anywhere from 1-6 times a night, rocking, nursing, cuddling, singing... and now it's over. That special time, that only her and I share together, is over. I couldn't help thinking of those times nursing her and she pulls away just to gaze up at me and smile so sweetly, then goes back to business. Then the way she would stick her leg up in the air and hold her foot while drinking her fill. I'll never get that time back. And as much as I was ready to be done because it's so demanding sometimes, it's still heart-breaking. Because she isn't a BABY anymore. That paired with the fact that she is walking now... she's a toddler. Thank you for those memories Sophie. As much of a stinker you have been this first year, I can say with all sincerity, I wouldn't change it for anything in the world.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Glad You're Still Here
On Monday, February 22nd, we received a very scary phonecall... that Frankie's dad was in the ER getting an emergency tracheotomy and was not able to breathe on his own. Within a couple hours we had 3 bags and 2 kids in the car and were headed to southern california. Frank was in the ICU trying to recover from the operation, and had a blood transfusion. He was still not breathing on his own, and doctors thought they found fluid in his lungs. Frankie and his sister Jen went straight to the hospital, while I took care of the girls. Immediately after we got that first call we had prayed together, asking for God's hand over Frank. I spent the better part of that evening doing just that. I knew God knew what was in the future, and prayed that Frank would be comforted and healed. I asked for wisdom for all his doctors and nurses involved, and peace for all of us in the meantime.
The next day I was able to visit Frank. He was in good spirits, and keeping his sense of humor... making us laugh through our face masks by dancing to the sound of his monitors is something I won't forget. Granted, I couldn't stay long. I found myself getting so warm and light-headed in that ICU room, under my sweatshirt, the apron, gloves, mask, etc. I had to get air... rushing out of his room and finding a place to sit down wasn't enough. Vomitting a couple times in the hallway seemed to do the trick though. Can we say humiliating?? A very unexpected reaction, but needless to say I haven't been back to the ICU yet. The doctors are moving Frank to a regular room so I am hoping once they do that I can manage another visit.
Anyways... Frank, glad you're still here. God is so good. My prayers haven't changed. I am still praying for your constant healing... physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I am praying for the ultimate in wisdom for the doctors to know what's best for you. I am praying you will receive all the support you need to recover from this, since it won't happen overnight. And, I am praying for God to reveal to all of us the good that is going to come of this. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." -Romans 8:28
Please take this to heart Frank. We love you.
The next day I was able to visit Frank. He was in good spirits, and keeping his sense of humor... making us laugh through our face masks by dancing to the sound of his monitors is something I won't forget. Granted, I couldn't stay long. I found myself getting so warm and light-headed in that ICU room, under my sweatshirt, the apron, gloves, mask, etc. I had to get air... rushing out of his room and finding a place to sit down wasn't enough. Vomitting a couple times in the hallway seemed to do the trick though. Can we say humiliating?? A very unexpected reaction, but needless to say I haven't been back to the ICU yet. The doctors are moving Frank to a regular room so I am hoping once they do that I can manage another visit.
Anyways... Frank, glad you're still here. God is so good. My prayers haven't changed. I am still praying for your constant healing... physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I am praying for the ultimate in wisdom for the doctors to know what's best for you. I am praying you will receive all the support you need to recover from this, since it won't happen overnight. And, I am praying for God to reveal to all of us the good that is going to come of this. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." -Romans 8:28
Please take this to heart Frank. We love you.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Sophia ~ 1 Year Old
Here we are, another year passed. My youngest, my "baby" is a year old. I simply can't believe that in a matter of days she will be toddling around the house all on her own. On Valentine's Day she took 4-5 steps all on her own. Only V and I were the ones to see it, and I'll never forget the excitement in V's voice as she pointed and shouted "Mommy! Sophie is walking all by herself!"
Our dear little Sophie,
You continue to enrich our lives daily with your funny faces, high-pitched squeals, slobbery kisses, and priceless cuddling.
You have brought so much joy to not only our lives, but your sissy's too. My daily prayer is that you continue to grow in health and in the Lord. We have been so incredibly blessed to have the privilege of being your parents; raising you, teaching you, and watching you grow. Happy 1st Birthday baby girl, looking forward to many more birthdays to come.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Some Things I'm Learning - S.T.I.L.
Don't mean to sound like a broken record, but in reference to the changes that are happening in my life, I am learning some things. Things I should have learned a long time ago. Nevertheless, I am learning them now, and I want to record them. So whenever you see a post from now on titled "S.T.I.L." you will know what it means... Some Things I'm Learning. (And ironically, it makes the word "still." Since I should have had these things figured out quite some time ago.)
So, here we go.... Some Things I'm Learning:
HOW WE LOVE OTHERS IS TO BE OUR WITNESS TO AN UNBELIEVING WORLD.
I know, starting out with some deep stuff right? But this is what I've come to notice about myself recently... there have been so many instances when I see someone I haven't seen in awhile, and I walk away from the brief conversation and realize I barely asked them about what is going on in their life, they asked about me the whole time. Or, I choose to only surround myself with certain people because of my comfort zone, because they fit into my little bubble of approved people. Or, those who I feel aren't worthy of my kindness for one reason or another get pushed aside. The last couple of weeks I have been studying in John, and it amazed me to take a close look at how Jesus was with Judas the entire time He spent with him. ALWAYS kind. ALWAYS loving. ALWAYS giving him every opportunity to change. Even though He knew all along what Judas was going to do, He knew his heart. Then, reading John 13:34-35 when Jesus is talking with His disciples the night before He is crucified (after Judas has taken off determined to betray Jesus) "Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples." It occurred to me that I do not love this way. If I did, why wouldn't I ask others how they are doing before rambling on about myself? Why would I complain when my husband asks for a back scratch? Why would I complain when someone needs something of me, and I just don't feel like helping them right now? I know these things are small, but they come from somewhere. I want people to be able to look at me and say, "Something is different about her." Not, "Wow, I didn't know she was a Christian." I have always had the fear of people withdrawing if they knew about that part of me... but that's just it. My faith isn't just one small part of my life... it IS my life, and if that's what others don't want to be around, that's their choice. "Then he said to the disciples, 'Anyone who accepts your message is also accepting me. And anyone who rejects you is rejecting me. And anyone who rejects me is rejecting God, who sent me.'" Luke 10:16
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD IS LIKE ANY OTHER RELATIONSHIP : IT REQUIRES QUALITY TIME.
This may sound totally stupid, totally ridiculous... but this is how I know God is seriously at work in me. The other night, I had (still do) my 3 favorite shows recorded on my DVR to catch up on. Lost, American Idol, and The Bachelor. One of my favorite things is once the girls are fast asleep in bed, I can curl up on the couch with a blanket, maybe a bowl of cereal, and it's Mommy's time. My time. I get to indulge myself in my guilty pleasures for an hour or two and then sleepily crawl off the couch and go to bed... too tired to do anything else. Well, as I had mentioned a few posts ago, I have been praying for God to grow my faith, for me to want to spend more time in the Word, not just doing my lesson because I'm supposed to and I don't want to show up with only half done. And here I was the other night, just putting Sophie to sleep, Frankie working, and the thought came to me that I really don't care about those shows right now. I would actually RATHER crawl into my bed, turn some lights on and read the Bible for a bit, do some of my lesson. I couldn't believe that. That is HUGE for me. I wanted, wait no, PREFERRED to spend time with Him. That was a crazy good feeling. And I realized my relationship with God isn't any different than say, my relationship with my husband, or, my kids. When you spend quality time with someone, that's what builds. That's how love grows. So how could I expect to just magically love God more by just praying for it? I play a role in that. It's up to me to make that effort for quality time.
The very first lecture in BSF this year, back in September, the teaching leader started out by asking, "What do you pour your life into?" And she gave examples... kids, career, etc. The most important thing I can do with my time is to spend it with God. And if I want more of God's truth I need to act on the truth He has already given me. The most important thing to find out is what God says. And I can't depend on a 45-minute sermon every Sunday and a bible study class each Wednesday to do it for me. I prayed not only to know Him more, but for the desire to know Him more... and I got what I asked for.
So, here we go.... Some Things I'm Learning:
HOW WE LOVE OTHERS IS TO BE OUR WITNESS TO AN UNBELIEVING WORLD.
I know, starting out with some deep stuff right? But this is what I've come to notice about myself recently... there have been so many instances when I see someone I haven't seen in awhile, and I walk away from the brief conversation and realize I barely asked them about what is going on in their life, they asked about me the whole time. Or, I choose to only surround myself with certain people because of my comfort zone, because they fit into my little bubble of approved people. Or, those who I feel aren't worthy of my kindness for one reason or another get pushed aside. The last couple of weeks I have been studying in John, and it amazed me to take a close look at how Jesus was with Judas the entire time He spent with him. ALWAYS kind. ALWAYS loving. ALWAYS giving him every opportunity to change. Even though He knew all along what Judas was going to do, He knew his heart. Then, reading John 13:34-35 when Jesus is talking with His disciples the night before He is crucified (after Judas has taken off determined to betray Jesus) "Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples." It occurred to me that I do not love this way. If I did, why wouldn't I ask others how they are doing before rambling on about myself? Why would I complain when my husband asks for a back scratch? Why would I complain when someone needs something of me, and I just don't feel like helping them right now? I know these things are small, but they come from somewhere. I want people to be able to look at me and say, "Something is different about her." Not, "Wow, I didn't know she was a Christian." I have always had the fear of people withdrawing if they knew about that part of me... but that's just it. My faith isn't just one small part of my life... it IS my life, and if that's what others don't want to be around, that's their choice. "Then he said to the disciples, 'Anyone who accepts your message is also accepting me. And anyone who rejects you is rejecting me. And anyone who rejects me is rejecting God, who sent me.'" Luke 10:16
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD IS LIKE ANY OTHER RELATIONSHIP : IT REQUIRES QUALITY TIME.
This may sound totally stupid, totally ridiculous... but this is how I know God is seriously at work in me. The other night, I had (still do) my 3 favorite shows recorded on my DVR to catch up on. Lost, American Idol, and The Bachelor. One of my favorite things is once the girls are fast asleep in bed, I can curl up on the couch with a blanket, maybe a bowl of cereal, and it's Mommy's time. My time. I get to indulge myself in my guilty pleasures for an hour or two and then sleepily crawl off the couch and go to bed... too tired to do anything else. Well, as I had mentioned a few posts ago, I have been praying for God to grow my faith, for me to want to spend more time in the Word, not just doing my lesson because I'm supposed to and I don't want to show up with only half done. And here I was the other night, just putting Sophie to sleep, Frankie working, and the thought came to me that I really don't care about those shows right now. I would actually RATHER crawl into my bed, turn some lights on and read the Bible for a bit, do some of my lesson. I couldn't believe that. That is HUGE for me. I wanted, wait no, PREFERRED to spend time with Him. That was a crazy good feeling. And I realized my relationship with God isn't any different than say, my relationship with my husband, or, my kids. When you spend quality time with someone, that's what builds. That's how love grows. So how could I expect to just magically love God more by just praying for it? I play a role in that. It's up to me to make that effort for quality time.
The very first lecture in BSF this year, back in September, the teaching leader started out by asking, "What do you pour your life into?" And she gave examples... kids, career, etc. The most important thing I can do with my time is to spend it with God. And if I want more of God's truth I need to act on the truth He has already given me. The most important thing to find out is what God says. And I can't depend on a 45-minute sermon every Sunday and a bible study class each Wednesday to do it for me. I prayed not only to know Him more, but for the desire to know Him more... and I got what I asked for.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Guess What?
Chicken butt. Yes, chicken BUTT. And who says that? Who teaches this catchy phrase to innocent 3 year olds??
The culprit:
The smell of fresh blueberry muffins baking in the oven fills the house as I grab V and kiss her face all over and she giggles. Such a beautiful picture right? That's when we hear it. "Guess what?" says Goofy. "What?" asks Mickey. "Chicken butt!" shouts Goofy as he laughs.
I think my jaw actually dropped a little, then I had to put my DVR to good use to rewind it and confirm what I thought I heard. And I heard correct. Really? Playhouse Disney?? Whose target audience is children ages 2-5 years old. Thanks guys. Much appreciated.
The culprit:
The smell of fresh blueberry muffins baking in the oven fills the house as I grab V and kiss her face all over and she giggles. Such a beautiful picture right? That's when we hear it. "Guess what?" says Goofy. "What?" asks Mickey. "Chicken butt!" shouts Goofy as he laughs.
I think my jaw actually dropped a little, then I had to put my DVR to good use to rewind it and confirm what I thought I heard. And I heard correct. Really? Playhouse Disney?? Whose target audience is children ages 2-5 years old. Thanks guys. Much appreciated.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Accomplishments, Skills, Talents??
So Frankie and I joined a small group through our church. Last Wednesday was our first week, and we seriously met some awesome couples. We had a yummy chicken tortilla soup dinner, with some crazy good mango salsa (yes, I had to mention the food cause it was THAT good) and just spent the 2 hours getting to know one another. Each couple had to share either how they met, how he proposed, or a funny story about the honeymoon. So that was interesting.
Now, tonight, we have to come prepared to tell about 2 accomplishments, skills/ talents, or something interesting about ourselves. Then 1 fictional yet believable one. And the rest of the group has to distinguish the 2 truths from the fiction. Should be fun right? Ya, I thought so too.... until I started making my mental list to choose which ones I would talk about...
SKILLS:
- I can change diapers like nobody's business.
- I can braid hair on a head that never stops moving... not once.
- I can navigate through pitch black darkness at 2AM and not run into a single thing.
- I can time the insertion of squash into a tiny mouth at the exact interval needed to avoid any spraying, smearing, or launching off the spoon.
Wait, I think to myself, are these the skills they are referring to??
Ok, let's try accomplishments instead...
ACCOMPLISHMENTS:
- I successfully pushed out two human beings from my own body without any vomiting or defecating.
- I have spent an entire day in my PJ's with plans to clean at least one room and not actually completed a thing. I know, amazing right?
Ok, so I don't think this is working...
So if any of you know of some magical skill or accomplishment I possess that I have not yet realized, do bring it to my attention... quickly.
Now, tonight, we have to come prepared to tell about 2 accomplishments, skills/ talents, or something interesting about ourselves. Then 1 fictional yet believable one. And the rest of the group has to distinguish the 2 truths from the fiction. Should be fun right? Ya, I thought so too.... until I started making my mental list to choose which ones I would talk about...
SKILLS:
- I can change diapers like nobody's business.
- I can braid hair on a head that never stops moving... not once.
- I can navigate through pitch black darkness at 2AM and not run into a single thing.
- I can time the insertion of squash into a tiny mouth at the exact interval needed to avoid any spraying, smearing, or launching off the spoon.
Wait, I think to myself, are these the skills they are referring to??
Ok, let's try accomplishments instead...
ACCOMPLISHMENTS:
- I successfully pushed out two human beings from my own body without any vomiting or defecating.
- I have spent an entire day in my PJ's with plans to clean at least one room and not actually completed a thing. I know, amazing right?
Ok, so I don't think this is working...
So if any of you know of some magical skill or accomplishment I possess that I have not yet realized, do bring it to my attention... quickly.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Passionately Committed
As many of you know I go to BSF (Bible Study Fellowship). It is a bible study designed to grow deeper in knowledge and understanding of God and the Bible. It involves a daily lesson plan and reading. About 3 weeks ago, somewhere around studying John chapter 10, where Jesus refers to Himself as the good Shepherd, it slugged me. I realized what kind of shepherd Jesus is. I've read this chapter more than once, yet it never hit me like it did now. Do any of us really get how He takes care of us? I mean REALLY get it? Why did God use the metaphor of sheep and a shepherd to describe His relationship to us? Because it's the only relationship there is to begin to scratch the surface of what all it entails....
1.) The sheep KNOW their shepherd's voice.
Yes, this is real. Sheep would recognize their own shepherd's voice, and respond to it. And no one else's. John 10:8 says, "All others who came before me were thieves and robbers. But the true sheep did not listen to them." TRUE sheep, meaning a child of God, someone who is saved. And the only way for us to tell the difference between the counterfeit shepherd (false pastors, corrupt leaders, etc.) and the true shepherd is to KNOW the truth (the Word) so that we may recognize it when we see it. This is helpful in a time such as this, our country in the shape it is in.
2.) The shepherd leads them, goes ahead of them, and cares for His sheep.
This gives us security. He never pushes us, He LEADS. And CARES for us. Do you know what shepherds had to do for their sheep on a daily basis? They knew each sheep, one by one. As Christ knows us by name. 1 Corinthians 8:3 "But the person who loves God is the one God knows and cares for." Firstly, they had to constantly free them of flies and parasites. They would circle the pen throughout the day, inspecting each one, cleaning them, checking for any injuries that needed attention, etc. They had to make sure they were well fed. And free of stress. I know right, a sheep? Stressed? If a sheep was distressed in any way, it would not lay down and sleep, and it's health would decline from there. And then obviously, have to check and make sure all were in attendance. If a sheep had wandered, not able to find its way home, (and also leading other sheep astray) do you know what that shepherd would have to do? He would go and search out that one sheep. When he found it, he would have to gently break it's leg, so that he could throw it upon his shoulders and carry it home. Hmm... interesting. You know you've seen that picture before, Jesus carrying a sheep over his shoulders... you think, ah, how sweet, little Fluffy likes being held and cuddled. No, Fluffy was being taught a lesson, if you will, so that he could be brought back home again.
Anyways, what I am getting at is I received such deep insight into what it means... "the Good Shepherd." And after thinking over the last couple of weeks about what has brought on this understanding, I remembered something. For a couple months I have been praying occasionally for something: for God to grow my faith. I think it is a scary prayer to pray. I have to admit I didn't want to at first. Because usually when you think of your faith growing it involves a challenge. Or some kind of trial. And though trials are what grow our faith, that doesn't always have to be the case. I simply prayed for God to change me. Change the ugly things about me. And to fuel my desire to know Him more, to WANT to get into the Word. Not doing it just because I'm in a bible study and need to get my lesson done. And that all starts with a passionate commitment. A passionate commitment to Him. So really, I basically prayed for me to love Him more. To want to get to know Him better and His will for my life. And as silly as it is for me to be surprised, I am. I'm surprised at how much He is on my mind. I'm surprised at how much I want to do for Him, and how much I want Him to be glorified in it. Even as I'm typing this, it sounds strange that this is me saying this. Not that it should, I have always loved the Lord, but, it's different now. Deeper, stronger, and I feel like I'm at the beginning. I don't know what kind of work He is going to do in me, but I'm ready for it, whatever it is. Because now I'm passionately committed.
"I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. The hired hand is not the shepherd who owns the sheep. So when he sees the wolf coming, he abandons the sheep and runs away. Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it. The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep.
I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep. I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd. The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life—only to take it up again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again. This command I received from my Father." JOHN 10:11-18
Monday, February 8, 2010
Turning a New Leaf (blog-wise that is)
So here it is: I am turning a new leaf in my blog life. I want to keep it updated... I want new pictures posted often. I want to keep record of all the hilarious things Victoria says... and the adventures my curious little Sophie gets into.
There are changes happening in our family, in our lives, and I want to have something to look back on and see it all described in my own words, as I am experiencing it.
So stay tuned... much more to come!!
There are changes happening in our family, in our lives, and I want to have something to look back on and see it all described in my own words, as I am experiencing it.
So stay tuned... much more to come!!
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